LITTLE KIDS GALORE

Survived my first day as a DOESN'T THIS OWL MAKE AN AWESOME HAT SUMMER CAMP volunteer. Don't know if I can do two more weeks of this. Owls make my bad-hair-day hair look like a bad-nest-day.
I bravely fought through the torrents of little children who had not yet to be educated how to write their first names properly. I had to write it for most of them on their terrible coloring worksheets. Then they got upset because I wrote their names on the sun's teeth. In my opinion, there was no sun anywhere on the page, unless that green demented tulip in the corner nowhere near their name was the sun. If so, the sun needs cosmetic surgery, like too many of the tragic millionaire reality show celebs. Just sayin'.
Then they made owls. This, of course, was accomplished with crayons and paper bags, not two owls of different genders. Apparently this wasn't science camp. For me, however, it was torture camp.
Afterwards, several of the young kids donned their owls on their heads and decided they were the next models on the Calvin Klein runway.
Hey, it could happen.
We later ate our snacks. Several kids whose parents had conveniently "forgotten" to bring their snacks got free snacks from the camp. Heh, cheapskates. Several children who had healthy (read: tasteless) snacks from home were jealous of the flashy bright packaging of the free snacks the cheapiceskates got. I tried to explain to the tastelessfood children that the bright colors were designed to suck the souls out of the cheapiceskates by the rainbow fairy. I'm not sure I even believed myself.
Then we took a hike, and each and every little kid felt compelled to stop at every single blade of glass to point out the "greenness" of it. Or the "sinkingness" of it. I think they'd been drinking too much Wall Street. Then they pointed out a caterpillar to me. Turned out it was some kid's nose snot.
Ah, all in the name of college transcripts.

Please note everything in this post was exaggerated and the writer does like her volunteer, unpaid, slave-driven, work of sitting around and making creepy faces at tiny chipmunks--er, kids.